VH2: Cait Sith's Real Story
by caitsith879
Summary: Hey, The Marshmellow cowboy is alive! This is a fan fiction about cait sith's real story. And if you haven't cought on, i like cait sith, he is my favorite character, please if you read this leave some feed back and if you wanna pitch me some ideas e-ma


VH2: Behind the cait sith  
  
Shinra: When we created Ctg805-y~3 AKA Cait Sith, we had plans for him to be a spy against any who opposed us but, we didn't know until before that the scientist who created it was planning a revolt and made cait sith so that it would be able to work without our control. So we decided to put a memory chip into his electronic super brain to make us follow him. Later data also shown that cait sith was so smart that he left the company many times to meet friends, FRIENDS! This was a robot and it wasn't supposed to have friends. The day for the chip instillation was bad. A lighting bolt flew into the room just before the chip was implanted and cait sith got away.  
  
Cait Sith: Yes, the day they tried to put the chip into me.... Is this thing on? (Producer from the back: Yes!) Cool, well any.... way (Cuts to a commercial, cait sith starts playing with the camera, he is given a hot pocket and told to sit down)  
  
Cait sith: Ok (yummy) the lightning bolt incident, some say it was an act of god, no it wasn't it was just....  
  
Black Mage: It was I, cait sith is an old drinking buddy that needed some help so I just cast bolt 3 and that chip was screwed. It was fun, and then I fried some scientists for fun (wink)  
  
Fighter: I LIKE SWORDS! (Black mage comes in and stabs fighter)  
  
Cait: What was that blood-curdling scream? Well don't care anymore. So now all the stuff with the golden saucer, giving the material to shinra top officials, blah, blah, blah. Getting back the material. Ok now that everyone trusts me, we can talk about the adventures of us.  
  
Tifa: Hi everyone, tifa here to give you the scoop on cait sith, that adorable, fluffy, sweet cream puff. I really like cait sith, we used to talk until the wee hours of the morning, about everything, I found out that he was kinda like a doll, and I love dolls so it was even cooler that we met. Some of the other girls I think wanted him also, but now for a final fantasy crossover!  
  
LuLu: Hi, Meeting cait sith was interesting, I thought he would be like other guys just starring at my breasts and always hitting on me but, he was different he introduced him self and asked about me and asked how I was. That's the kind of man that I want.  
  
Rikku: HiiiiiIIIiii, ummmmm, this is fun, I like cait sith, he plays games with me and is also shares the same interests. He also is the only man to calm me down. The other person is lulu when she casts slowga and then I'm really slow. I like Clouds  
  
(Cloud runs in and sits next to Rikku, puts his arm around her)  
  
Cloud: Hey, what's up baby?  
  
Rikku: what are you doing?  
  
Cloud: you said you liked cloud  
  
Rikku: CLOUDS!  
  
Cloud: Yea, cloud (Aeris comes in and is very mad, takes out gigantic hammer that is pulled from nowhere and hits cloud and pulls him away)  
  
Aeris: I hate you cloud!  
  
RedXIII: I was skeptical at first but then I learned to trust cait sith and his ways. For being a doll he was very wise in his speaking and put a lot of thought in to what he said.  
  
Black Mage: I hate fighter, IDEA! (Black mage runs out of the room and grabs cloud)  
  
Fighter: Sword-chucks!  
  
(Black mage runs in with cloud and impales fighter with cloud's hair)  
  
(fighter screams out in terror)  
  
Cait Sith: What was Th......Don't care anymore  
  
Black mage: (Evil Laugh) hahahahahahahahahahaha  
  
(Then as more torture, black mage sticks out one finger and starts drilling it into fighters skull, SLOWLY!)  
  
Fighter: Hahaha, it doesn't hurt cause there is nothing in there  
  
Black mage: Well ill are damned, your right, and your completely brainless  
  
Fighter: I Know!  
  
(cut to commercial)  
  
Yuna: After losing Tidus, I couldn't look at another man the same way again. Cait Sith, was the first person to ask me how I felt. He asked why he met so much and where did I think he was. Ummmmm( yuna starts tearing up in the eyes) Can you give me a second, it's kind of emotional.  
  
Sephiroth: I Hate You All!  
  
Wakka: Like, Cait Sith is my bro, you know! We been chillin at da beach, boy! He is a good swimmer and great with the ladies! Not as good as me though. Hahaha LuLu: What was that wakka?  
  
Wakka: I mean all my love is for you?  
  
LuLu: I don't like liars!  
  
Wakka: uhhhhh, ohhhh  
  
LuLu: Double Cast ULTIMA!  
  
( Wakka is fried to a crisp, LuLu grabs him by the ear and pulls him away)  
  
(break to commercial)  
  
Tifa: When I'm asked about cloud, everyone thinks that him and me were something, well for a while, and then my cait sithy came along. And cloud was a thing of the past!  
  
(Cloud comes in; mad because he was listening to it all)  
  
Cloud: Now I'm going to find cait sith and kick his ass for you tifa!  
  
Tifa: Whatever!  
  
(Cloud goes and finds cait sith talking with Rikku)  
  
Cloud: Now, we will fight for tifa!  
  
Cait: Give it up, man! Tifa is with me and not with you.  
  
(Long pause)  
  
Cait: But if you want to fight let's go!  
  
(Cloud pulls out the buster sword)  
  
Cloud: What do you have, your stupid megaphone?  
  
Cait: No, I have got a better idea, excuse me for a second.  
  
(Cait sith goes out and grabs some cloth, glue and a pane of glass)  
  
Cloud: What is with this stuff?  
  
Cait: you'll see!  
  
(Cait sith first raps his hands in the cloth with help from Rikku)  
  
Cloud: Wow, I'm so scared!  
  
Cait: Rikku come here (whisper)  
  
(Rikku grabs the pane of glass and smacks cloud over the head with it, she then gathers the pieces of glass and puts them on the table)  
  
Cait: Now, I will dip my hands in the glue to make it really sticky.  
  
Cloud: Wow, you're going to make me sticky! What ever should I do?  
  
Cait: Now for the finishing touches!  
  
(Cait sith now puts his clothed and glued hands into the glass so he has some sick weapon)  
  
Cloud: OH NO! Is that the...  
  
Cait: yes, this is the mighty DUH DUH DUH  
  
CLT COMBO (ECHO)  
  
Cloud: CLT?  
  
Cait: Cait Sith loves Tifa, we both thought of the name!!  
  
Cloud: Whatever! Lets fight!  
  
(Cloud goes to swing the sword, but he has became to wussy to pull the sword up, so he start to cry as cait sith runs up and hits him with the clt combo and cloud flies through the wall and is carried off by 67 moogles)  
  
Cait: That was funny Rikku!  
  
Rikku: yeah, the moogles!  
  
(Tifa runs in and gives cait sith a big hug)  
  
Tifa: Let's go be alone!  
  
(A curtain is pulled up and tifa and cait sith start kissing, Rikku looks back and starts getting excited)  
  
Rikku: Can I join? Please!  
  
(Rikku is pulled behind the curtain and she coos, cait sith now stands up)  
  
Cait: I think this is the end, bye-bye!  
  
(Camera turns off, then turns back on, and you see cait sith, tifa and Rikku walking onto cait sith's private plane to go to his private house in the Bahamas)  
  
THE END! 


End file.
